Dating to exclusive
Our chemistry was immediate (physical, intellectual, and emotional) and things have been very easy so far. I am totally comfortable with the speed (how often we are communicating, seeing each other, and sharing information about ourselves).But, we recently slept together (it felt right and was great).I agree with Evan’s advice to have the boyfriend/sexclusivity conversation before sex.The only place I would differ is on the specific advice to the OP.This is not to say that it’s “wrong” to commit to someone before 4 weeks; merely that you’ll have a better sense of who you’re committing if you vet him first, instead of giving him a free pass to boyfriend-hood because you like him and want to sleep with him.To the original poster’s point, you really shouldn’t have to “bring up” whether he’s your boyfriend.I would like to know that he isn’t sleeping with anyone else and won’t be sleeping with anyone else while we are sleeping together.
What’s the point of talking to other guys when I like this one guy so much? the other guy isn’t necessarily as smitten with you. That’s a guy who is seeing you, seeing others, and keeping his options open.And, if I don’t talk with him immediately, when is the right time to talk about being exclusive (if he doesn’t bring it up)? I’m going to give you a cheat sheet to tell you the most effective way to get into a relationship with a new guy.Before I do, I’d like to pre-empt all of the people who are inclined to tell me I’m wrong because they did it another way: yes, there are 100 ways to do things.Finally, if you DID bring it up, he would probably laugh because he already thought of you as his girlfriend already.Share this with your friends who want to know a healthy relationship timeline.
Thus, you’re judging him not merely for your feelings towards him, but rather his consistent efforts to call you and see you over the course of a month. How many of those same men prove to do it over and over and over again for 4-6 weeks? An easier way to look at this is that you have MUCH more information about a person after, say, 7-8 dates than you do after 2-3 dates.