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Carmen Coleman, 51, a Fairport financial planner divorced for 12 years, has been dating for two years.She’s decided against the online route because she says she can’t get a true picture of what a person is like.“It’s too risky to initially meet someone online,” says Coleman, who has three children, ages 16, 19 and 25. It takes two years of dating someone to really know them.”She met one man at work, another at church (who later reached out to her via Facebook).Whether widowed, divorced or never married, women are trying to define how they want their next relationships to look — if they can find someone to date — and how to define the dating terrain.They want to set some guidelines for themselves before they meet someone.Finding a sense of self — and approaching relationships with confidence and integrity — are easier when you are in a comfortable situation and a must for successful dating.
Another, Parents Without Partners, is for people over 45.
Rochester Fun Raisers (over40andsingle .com) targets those 40 and older.
Cultural groups and events also can provide some people a comfortable meeting place.
It has been successful for two of my friends who are now married to someone they met on Match.”When people are older, relationships are more complicated.
Both people bring emotional baggage, family obligations and financial obligations, plus differing ideas, and possible concerns, about sexual performance, says Anne Graham, 63, a mental health counselor and a divorced mother of a 26-year-old from Penfield.
“I had phone contact — mainly on the phone —– with several men.